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"Tangled" I'm full of regret For all things that I've done and said And I don't know if it'll ever be ok to show My face 'round here Sometimes I wonder if I disappear Would you ever turn your head and look See if I'm gone Cause I fear There is nothing left to say to you That you wanna hear That you wanna know I think I should go The things I've done are way too shameful Your just innocent A helpless victim of a spider's web And I'm an insect Goin after anything that I can get So you better turn your head and run And don't look back Cause I fear There is nothing left to say To you That you wanna hear That you wanna know I think I should go The things I've done are way too shameful And I've done you so wrong Treated you bad Strung you along Oh shame on myself I don't know how I got so tangled up// "Beautiful Thing" Well I'll follow you wherever When you lead me by my nose On another big adventure- I suppose Then you lay me down in clover With their petals on my back I should make some time To do more things like that... [Pre chorus/chorus] Won't you sing to me your poetry, Won't you take me to your home, Won't you be for me forever So I'll never be alone And just one thing... If you're my queen... Then it's a beautiful thing... Well I'm buried in my bedroom Under fourteen feet of clothes I could drown in all this clutter I suppose But then you're standing in my doorway With a suitcase on your back And it blows my mind When you do things like that [Pre chorus/ chorus] Yeah, reminding me Well I might be poor But summers free... For me, I didn't know I was sleeping [Pre chorus/ chorus] SPIN I'd rather chase your shadow all my life than be afraid of my own I'd rather be with you I'd rather not know where I'll be than be alone and convinced that I know and the world keeps spinning round my world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing I've got nothing else to lose I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change a thing no, you and I wouldn't change a thing everything I know has let me down so I will just let go let you turn me inside out cause I know I'm not sure about anything but you wouldn't have it any other way and the world keeps spinning round my world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing I've got nothing else to lose I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change a thing no, you and I wouldn't change a thing spinning turning watching burning all my life has found its meaning walking crawling climbing falling all my life has found its meaning you and I wouldn't change a thing no, you and I wouldn't change a thing and the world keeps spinning round my world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing I've got nothing else to lose I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change a thing no, you and I wouldn't change a thing no, you and I wouldn't change a thing TAKE ME AWAY this time what I want is you there is no one else who can take your place this time you burn me with your eyes you see past all the lies you take it all away I've seen it all and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away I try to make my way to you but still I feel so lost I don't know what else I can do I've seen it all and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away don't give up on me yet don't forget who I am I know I'm not there yet but don't let me stay here alone this time what I want is you there is no one else who can take your place I've seen enough and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away "Breathe Your Name" It's every day I'm in this place I feel this way I feel the same It's every day I'm in this place I feel this way I feel the same Is it all inside my head Is it all inside my head I view the my lips And take my pick I view my faith And make a choice 'Cause it's nobody else's but mine But you are in my heart I can feel you're deep And I lose my mind From behind the wheel When I lose control I can only breathe your name I can only breathe your name So many days within this ways I need the truth I need some grace I need the path To find my place I need some truth I need some grace The part of you That's part of me We'll never die We'll never leave And it's nobody else's but mine You are in my heart I can feel your beat And you move my mind From behind the wheel When I lose control I can only breathe your name I can only breathe your name You'll view their lips And take your pick You'll view my faith And make a choice 'Cause it's nobody else's but yours Your in my heart I can feel you're deep And you move my mind From behind the wheel When I lose control I can only breathe your name 'Cause your in my heart I can feel you're deep And you move my mind From behind the wheel When I lose control I can only breathe your name I can only breathe your name I can only breathe your name I can only breathe your name "Everywhere" Turn it inside out so I can see The part of you that's drifting over me And when I wake you're, you're never there But when I sleep you're, you're everywhere You're everywhere Just tell me how I got this far Just tell me why you're here and who you are 'Cause every time I look You're never there And every time I sleep You're always there 'Cause you're everywhere to me And when I close my eyes it's you I see You're everything I know That makes me believe I'm not alone I'm not alone I recognize the way you make me feel It's hard to think that You might not be real I sense it now, the water's getting deep I try to wash the pain away from me Away from me 'Cause you're everywhere to me And when I close my eyes it's you I see You're everything I know That makes me believe I'm not alone I'm not alone I am not alone Whoa, oh, oooh, oh And when I touch your hand It's then I understand The beauty that's within It's now that we begin You always light my way I hope there never comes a day No matter where I go I always feel you so 'Cause you're everywhere to me And when I close my eyes it's you I see You're everything I know That makes me believe I'm not alone 'Cause you're everywhere to me And when I catch my breath It's you I breathe You're everything I know That makes me believe I'm not alone You're in everyone I see So tell me Do you see me? TAKE ME AWAY this time what I want is you there is no one else who can take your place this time you burn me with your eyes you see past all the lies you take it all away I've seen it all and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away I try to make my way to you but still I feel so lost I don't know what else I can do I've seen it all and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away don't give up on me yet don't forget who I am I know I'm not there yet but don't let me stay here alone this time what I want is you there is no one else who can take your place I've seen enough and it's never enough it keeps leaving me needing you take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away take me away take me away I've got nothing left to say just take me away "Dancing In The Moonlight" We get it on most every night when that moon is big and bright its a supernatural delight everybodys dancing in the moonlight we get everybody here is out of sight they dont bark and they dont bite they keep things loose they keep it tight everybodys dancing in the moonlight dancing in the moonlight everybodys feeling warm and bright its such a fine and natural sight everybodys dancing in the moonlight we like our fun and we never fight you cant dance and stay uptight its a supernatural delight everybody was dancing in the moonlight dancing in the moonlight everybodys feeling warm and bright its such a fine and natural sight everybodys dancing in the moonlight we get in on most every night and when that moon is big and bright its a supernatural delight everybodys dancing in the moonlight dancing in the moonlight everybodys feeling warm and bright its such a fine and natural sight everybodys dancing in the moonlight
Entries:

Me and the way I do things.

Sunday, August 21

:: ziddy 11:41 PM

hey..i've a new home..re-link me yeahh??


http://papercutpencils.blogspot.com



:: ziddy 12:31 AM

heyho...


i cant decide if i should sleep or something..

i don't know why..

yeah..

i updated ofus..it's crap..

think i'm gonna go read or something..

goodnight world.

i'm out!


Thursday, August 18

:: ziddy 10:41 PM

i've got two songs stuck in my head.

both by silverchair.

here's the first.

Suicidal Dream

I dream about, how it's gonna end
Approaching me quickly
Living a life of fear
I only want my mind to be clear
People, making fun of me
For no reason but jealousy
I fantisize about my death
I'll kill myself from holding my breath

My suicidal dream
Voices telling me what to do
My suicidal dream
I'm sure you will get yours too

Help me, comfort me
Stop me from feeling what I'm feeling now
The rope is here, now I'll find a use
I'll kill myself, I'll put my head in a noose

My suicidal dream
Voices telling me what to do
My suicidal dream
I'm sure you will get yours too

Dreamin' about my death, dream
Suicidal, suicidal, suicidal dream
I'm suicidal, suicidal dream


and the second.

Ana's Song (Open Fire)

Please die Ana
For as long as you're here we're not
You make the sound of laughter
and sharpened nails seem softer

And I need you now somehow
and I need you now somehow

Open fire on the needs designed
On my knees for you
Open fire on my knees desires
What I need from you

Imagine pageant
In my head the flesh seems thicker
Sandpaper tears corrode the film

And I need you now somehow
And I need you now somehow

Open fire on the needs designed
On my knees for you
Open fire on my knees desires
What I need from you

And you're my obsession
I love you to the bones
And Ana wrecks your life
Like an Anorexia life

Open fire on the needs designed
On my knees for you
Open fire on my knees desires
What I need from you
Open fire on the needs designed
Open fire on my knees desires
On my knees for you




please do excuse my current self.



:: ziddy 3:22 PM

i am sick and tired.

of certain people.

people who

i don't have any words for them.

certain things.

even the little things.

and sometimes the little things that make me smile.


i feel like.

i don't know what to feel anymore.

sick of feeling.

i'm tired of being angry.

i'm tired of being sad.

i'm tired of being tired.

but that's not the end of me.

or my suicidal dreams.

so screw you.

cause hey.

the world's all screwd.

wake up.

smell the tar.

wear tthe breaks.

crash.

burn.

and live with it.

OUT.


Wednesday, August 17

:: ziddy 9:47 PM

hey....

I AM INSPIRATIONLESS.

just when i need to get that song done..

this sucks...


Sunday, August 14

:: ziddy 2:42 PM

i'm updating my com..

just revamped it..

the service pack 3 taking bloody long to download..

hmm...i'm running a FEVER..

haish..again...

got a tan from yest..haha..

currently it looks pretty good..hahahaha..

yeahh..

went pacific plaza yest..then buy me flips at city surf..

took bloody long in deciding lar..haha..

i like my flips.. (:

my ears hurt..think my head too hot liao..

haish...

why is dad making me do this now?

but i've feeling can start downloading songs again..

pretty soon..

oh yeahh...

THANKS SHAH!!!!FOR DOWNLOADING ALL THE PROGRAMS I NEED EARLIER!!

haha..i'm off...

24% left.


Friday, August 12

:: ziddy 9:46 AM

in com lab 4..or 3 now..doing malay..yeah..the cerpen thing..havent been able to update at home..

com been screwing up..haha..

oh yeahh..

dad gonna cut the internet line next month..so that means no more internet for me..

just great...

haish..

life been..well...

colourful..

that seems to be the way that i can put it..

i'm gonna go..

try to be a (song)writer..

OUT!


Tuesday, August 2

:: ziddy 7:37 PM

heyho...

i'm at blk 612 i think..some internet place..yeah..

dad and mum went to ikea..bro with me here..haha. a buck 50 cents per hour not bad arh..

been listening to the msn indie radio..sweet..good music..haha..

place aint got no pp..

did my research for the third bloody time...

time's almost up soon..gotta go!!!!


Sunday, July 24

:: ziddy 11:21 PM

hey....

finally i see the blinking cursor thing that allows me to type...

first...

thank you dearest computer for letting me update..thank you very much..

haha..

been sick past few days...fever got all the way to 39.8...yeahh...
got freaked out for a while cause i was wearing layers of shirt took med and stuff and the fever didn't go down..

but i'll be back in sch..(:

i was in sch just that went home early.. (:
mum picked me up..

so sch has been..well...un-exciting...

when will it ever be?

think i'm pretty screwd for bio and amath..med and my non-discipline self..not studying...

yup...i'm pretty beat mentally...

i've nothing to look forward to anymore..i just realised....

oh yeahh...

hey..anon..apparently there is a kid that looks like me..as in height and hair only..not face...
i'm one of a kind...haha...*grins* that was not a self-praise...it was a very general answer..
everyone got something special that makes them different.. (:

*damn girl excuse my french i can't believe how good you look to me*

what song is that??


screw people who judge me through the bull you hear in school...
oh wait...
i think the sun would shine a little brighter and the world would be better if you'd come up to me to clarify whatever you've heard..if it's bull then we can have coffee and laugh over it..if it's true then..you still up for coffee anyways?maybe you'll see a different me.. (:


what the hell am i doing up at this hour on a school night with nothing to do??

my parents are spending too much on stuff not necessary...and i'm not even asking for a fender strat..

i'm full of angst today....

goodnight world..


Tuesday, July 12

:: ziddy 3:57 PM

i'm not okay....
i'm not wokay....

in com lab now...

your body is wonderland....


sorta just did lit..haha.my fingers are frozen..
and i've problems typing..haha..

yeahh...

was gonna be openly 'defiant' today..
decided against it..yeahh..heh..
kinad regret that i didn't..

hope to get ice cream or something today..yeahh..hahah...

YOU WEAR ME OUT!!!

haha..ehh...tmw got training!!!

wonder who gonna train us..

i'm kinda hungry..ahaha...whee...hehe..

gotta scooter...


Thursday, July 7

:: ziddy 9:15 PM

'heaven is overrated'

drops of jupiter playing..been stuck in my head all day..

'tell the story of a man who was too afraid to fly so he never did land..'

it's a nice song..

'did venus blow your mind?'

kinda writing another song for teacher's day..
my second?third song?

not so sure..wrote some other stuff too..

i'm getting sick of my own style..haha..
need find a new one..

hmm..

not tonight..

kinda tired..gonna go..

OUT!


Wednesday, June 29

:: ziddy 2:18 PM

heyho..
at the library right now..

hehe..

yeahh...
*turns left*sarah looking at MAC stuff....and she gonna get when?after jc..haha..

whee..okay..
aren't we suppose to be reading?
yes..i think so..

bout an hr ago got bad news..haish..

then earlier during legacy Ms. S just found out about me..
i'm surprised she was shock..

thought somebody in the school would have told her or something..
surprise surprise...

yeahh..they had the campaign-ing thing earlier too..haha..
was funny..
politics politics...

oh yeahh..and i'm in slam.. (:

nothing more to say..

till

NEXT.



:: ziddy 12:18 AM

i'm beat..

tired..

and it's only..tuesday..

oh hey..

it's wednesday already...

just did more stuff instead of some..

ooohh...mum found dad's all master chord chart...

so that means i can learn keyboards again!!! (:
and i got me the list of tabs.. (:

hehe..i can make me more music..and since i'm hoping learn the keyboards..
hope music gets better..

ooh...abang boy still owes me a keyboard since 2 hari raya's ago..or is it 3?

dad's organ at his place..hope abang boy don't want then dad take..then i can learn..heh..

ok..i'm gonna go do some other stuff now..

MORNING.


Tuesday, June 28

:: ziddy 2:07 AM

hey..

no fair..

seems like my few previous posts didn't come out..

bugger..i updated alot and stuff..

haish..nvm then..

kinda lazy to do so now.

it's 2 in the morning..already the 2nd day of this semester..

good morning all..

and good luck to those taking whatever papers today..

have fun! (:

OUT!


Sunday, June 19

:: ziddy 2:57 PM

i'm really sorry that i woke you up...




all that i have...
twenty six dollars and keys to a cadillac..
all i want..
to drive all night go anywhere you want to go..



got

- ali dude just called -

haha..fidah's friend..looking for her..
she must be at palawan now....

anws..got back from east coast around 12 there..
and i cant sleep..

slept or an hour only..from 7-8..haha..

yeahh..stayed up the whole bloody night..

and i resisted the temptation to drink..haha..

what was it?bacardi RAZ..still remember how it smells..

pretty much nothing happened..it was kinda boring..

according to dear cousin..we were suppose to go out 'racing' with a friend of hers..

the life my dear cousins lead..

and i'm the most..erm..how do i say this..

the most..'innocent'? most 'well behaved'?

basically they're all pretty havoc..

old school 90s punk people and stuff..

they smoke..drink..sometimes and stuff..

and with me being the 15 that i am..

somehow that means that sooner or later..i'll get my first sip or smt..

then again they don't know that i....

they still think that i'm the youngest..and that they gotta look out for me and stuff..

but recently they started to realise that i've grown..haha..it was funny...

shah said "can go jam and stuff..do all you want..still can get away..just don't get into shit..you know what i mean.."haha..

fidah thought i was 17/18?-amused-

i thought herm was 18..he's 19..

i thought she was 20..she's 22..

that makes shah 23/24?

i'm confused...

heh..

best i ever had (grey sky morning) stuck in my head..

been playing it on geet..

learnt it..

oh yeahh...

how come i don't see any all-girl band in that sunday life paper???

don't tell me there's no all-girl band!!

oh yea...

LOOKING FOR A GUITARIST AND VOCALIST

yup..

that should do it..off to..erm..find food.

sweet......

TANGERINE


Tuesday, June 14

:: ziddy 6:17 PM

hey......

my post last night didn't come out..

and it's gone...

bugger...

haha..

let me rest in peace...song stuck in my head right now..yup..

not much to say once again..

gonna TRY work on another song soon..

OUT!


Friday, June 10

:: ziddy 10:04 PM

*looks around*

why are people living my dreams?

my most simplest of dreams..

some got new guitars..elect/acoust..

others went to the beach..especially sentosa..

a few got their coms fixed..mine still screwed..

many have company..they got their own persons or people..

though i do too..i pretty much feel lonely..

the guitar..i've been trying to get through my dad since few years back..

the beach..i've been planning but nothing gets through either..

the com..my cousin still in ns..

and the latter..its hard to explain..

and now i only have songs or peoms to write...

which i doubt really gets to anyone..

i guess there's nothing more to expect..

.



:: ziddy 9:57 PM

heyho..

feeling kinda low..

not kinda..

i am feeling





low


yeahh...body aching and all..

think i got flu..

haha..

gonna go..

CHILL


Thursday, June 9

:: ziddy 9:40 PM

i have a song!!

complete!!

sorta..

don't have no title yet..

OUT



:: ziddy 4:41 PM

heyho...

i'm

BACK

so yeahh...

haha..well well..

got home ard 11..yup..forgot what i did..

ate and stuff..

woke up today at ard 10..had a slight fever..still running..

hmm..ever want to run after something but you feel you shouldn't?

i do..heh..it's neither funny nor anything to be happy bout but i'm smiling..

and i'm not gonna sit around and waste time thinking 'if only'..

and there you are wondering what i'm going on bout..

well..don't wonder..

so.

i'm kinda hungry now..

don't feel like eating the food at home..haha..

i miss guitar..

oh well...

i'm gonna go..

'hey you with the wedding dress on,
made of white chiffon blown in the wind...'

no

DOUBT.


Sunday, June 5

:: ziddy 1:07 PM

*yawns*

hey.....

i'm sleepy...

have yet to pack..

will do so in a while..then...

wait..till i fall asleep..

yeahh...

gonna clean up my room wee bit..

don't want mum messing it up..(in other words clearing up)

i need get batteries..

oh yeahh..

i got new shoes bout a week ago..

adidas..

influenced by my uncles..all soccer people..

so yeahh..

i keep hearing them telling me go get adidas stuff cause it lasts longer..

that's true..

so i did..heh..

bought some spray too..

took the blue instead of orange..

like the orange one much more..

think i'm gonna go throw a couple of shirts in my bag and then go sweep the house?

*shrugs*

i wanna sleep..heh..

bro thinks i type too fast and he's asking me to slow down..

hey...

oh..(thought i lost my fone..it's in my printer..)

bro reading garfield..

no doubt playing..don't speak..(beautiful song)

i'm wondering what's with the brackets..(*shrug*)

(:

bit of mischief..

chucky gots a whistle..

i gots harmomica..

gonna go..

*yawns*


Thursday, June 2

:: ziddy 9:54 PM

like a flower when it's blooming
like newborn when he's smiling

i feel..

screwed..

toyed..

used..

played..

choked..

somehow..

my dark

ANGEL.


Tuesday, May 31

:: ziddy 8:16 PM

*looks around*

so mom says she thinks i'm going out too much..

told her my plans for the hols..

there's bonding and classes last week..suppose to have palawan but that's cancelled..

going out too much mom?

went to pp to chill..

yeahh..

borrowed batman..ate waffle..went home..

thought we were suppose to have dinner out tonight?

i'm hungry..havent eaten a proper meal for the past two days..

just asked mom..she told me that dad working tonight..and yada yada..so not going anymore just she and dad went earlier..

and i was looking forward for dinner tonight..

i'm hungry..

least bro had a good lunch..his teacher treated his class kfc after classes today..

wait a min..havent had a proper meal in three days!!

last was breekz..at harbourfront..sat night..

then grans that day didn't eat..yest nope..was out..came home saw that mom cooked something which i don't really like..then today i got played..

and now..i've no idea how to........i 've no idea what anymore..

don't give a damn no more..

it's only

TUESDAY.



:: ziddy 12:42 PM

not really sure why i'm here..hehe

had a beautiful day yest..

dad actually realised i was wearing a new shirt..

then he asked whose shirt i'm wearing..

then i just smiled..mum too...

THANKS MOM!!

haha..then just today he asked where's my guitar..

told him it's with a friend..then he say why keep at your friend's hse..

then i was like no lar..she got classes then she wanna borrow..

then he was like you better watch out for you end years..

scary..

my com rather slow now..

will blog more later..not much to say..hehe..

(:


Monday, May 30

:: ziddy 9:30 AM

woke up round 9....

kinda having a migrain now..haish....

anyone free today wanna go lib look for joy luck club please msg me...
or if you just wanna chill msg also...

supposedly today got this guy coming over..then he never call..

i don't want to be stuck here...

well well...

guess i'm gonna check on the bbq...

oh yeahh....

good morning love.. (:

i need

ASPRIN


Sunday, May 29

:: ziddy 8:37 PM

kinda just ate..

was from grans..

mum and bro woke me up real early today..haha..at ard 9.30?

then yada yada..

mum wanted buy danny his overalls..

so looked in yellow pages for the shop..

left ard 11 went to raffles..

he's a year old and we bought him size 4T (4 toddlers)..haha..

that boy damn cheeky..saw me smile..haha..

yup..then i sorta slept for 3 hrs on the sofa..haha..

then left ard 5.30..bought dinner reached home 8..

i'm typing funny today..

think i'm going out tomorrow.. (:

got a call at 4 this morn..it was ed..haha..i was half asleep..he sang or smt..then realising that i was half asleep told me to cont sleeping..haha.. (:

woke up again at 7.25..sarah..what time you wake up?it's only SEVEN!!!

haha..yea..

people who want to go palawan/or any other beach..please tell me that you're free this thurs..say we meet at harbourfront round 12/1? please msg me.. (:

yeahh..ooh..gotta a phone call...

OUT
One liners

Photos